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 AOHell
told you so.
When: 8/14/2001
Company: AOL
Severity: 15
Points: 105
41 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 AOL killed the wabbit
Rumor has it AOL/Time Warner is closing all Warner Brothers retail stores. Lots more folks out of work thanks to AOL. Add sneak attacks like this, and we're hitting the 10,000 I predicted.
When: 8/14/2001
Company: AOL/Time Warner
Severity: 10
Points: 100
26 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

Lucked Vibrate your way to profitability!
Desperate Drugstore.com just started selling dildos. Rock on!
When: 8/14/2001
Company: Drugstore.com
Lucked: 30
Points: 123
32 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 zoom
Tyco (not this Tyco, a different Tyco) is laying off 11,300 people, 6%.
When: 8/14/2001
Company: Tyco
Severity: 10
Points: 110
7 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 WWF can't use WWF
World Wrastlin Federation was sued by the World Wildlife Fund over the domain name wwf.com and lost. WWF's defense was fans are too stupid to remember another URL. Too bad, they gotta change it now. lame.
When: 8/14/2001
Company: WWF
Severity: 10
Points: 110
25 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 My George Foreman Grill ROCKS
Netpliance, one-time Internet appliance peddlers, will effect a 1-for-15 reverse stock split on August 20, to stay listed on Nasdaq. At the same time, they're changing their name to "TippingPoint Technologies, Inc." How dumb is that?
When: 8/14/2001
Company: Netpliance
Severity: 80
Points: 179
20 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 I like some "mobile motion" (wink wink nudge nudge)
Rumor has it all 15 employees have been laid off from MobileMotion.com. Normally a company like this wouldn't be worthy of an FC fuck, but I just had to point out the most excellend use of Java applet rollovers on their homepage... die die die
When: 8/14/2001
Company: MobileMotion.com
Severity: 95
Points: 195
11 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Jump! Jump!
"WebJump will no longer be in service as of 9:00AM EST on August 15, 2001," says their site.
When: 8/14/2001
Company: Webjump.com
Severity: 100 - new hall of fame inductee!
Points: 200
8 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Clipped
Clip2.com, which started as an online clipping service and then tried to recast itself as a P2P network tracker, has this to say, "Clip2 is in the process of curtailing normal business operations and seeking buyers for its assets."
When: 8/14/2001
Company: Clip2.com
Severity: 100 - new hall of fame inductee!
Points: 200
6 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Shark
Rumor has it Linux hardware company Penguin Computing just axed 20-25% of its workforce. Only one week severance -- don't spend it all it one place.
When: 8/14/2001
Company: Penguin Computing
Severity: 50
Points: 150
22 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 umm, yeah
I'll update the site a little later today. In the meantime, enjoy this. Also enjoy Tawny, the new FC tshirt model on the right.
When: 8/13/2001
Company: Y2Khai
Severity: 1
Points: 101
211 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Back online
Listbot, Microsoft's free service that I was using to send out FC's gripping newsletter, the FC Sporadic, died last week. I've just finished the painful process of moving the entire list over to ListBuilder, Microsoft's *pay* service, and all looks to be okay now -- the newletter signup form on the right works again.
When: 8/10/2001
Company: Fuckedcompany.com
Severity: 10
Points: 103
142 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Flame broiled
Rumor has it, web shop Rare Medium laid off another 15 to 20 today. This brings their total headcount to less than 100 from what was once over 1,500. Rumor also has it that the following offices will be shutting down: San Francisco, Los Angeles, San Antionio, and Denver. This leaves NYC, Atlanta, and Dallas. Lastly, one more rumor has it (so many today...) that they only have 5 actual clients. I would say that they're doomed to die any minute now, but seriously -- if you once had 1,500 employees and now you can't even keep just 100 people busy, there's something seriously fucking wrong with you.
When: 8/10/2001
Company: Rare Medium
Severity: 90
Points: 189
203 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Green day
Despite the fact that they make money, rumor has it eBay is gonna lay off around 15% over the next few weeks.
When: 8/10/2001
Company: eBay Profile
Severity: 10
Points: 102
255 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Employees, 90% off
Rumor has it security escorted 90% of Kmart's BlueLight.com employees out of the San Franciso office. Apparently just a few people are left to shut it down. (it takes a few people to unplug the servers from the wall apparently)
When: 8/10/2001
Company: BlueLight.com
Severity: 95
Points: 193
79 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

Lucked Lease on life
Cross Media Marketing (Amex: XMM) just bought LifeMinders (Nasdaq: LFMN) for $68.1 million. Of course, LFMN has $50 million in the bank, a database with 20 million consumers, and some technology that they paid heftily for. So it's really not all that much. still... a luck that they were able to unload that fucker.
When: 8/10/2001
Company: LifeMinders
Lucked: 30
Points: 129
21 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Fly like an eagle... to the sea
Rumor has it, $2 million later, Paperfly.com, an online document storage and retreival service, has shut down. Good Luck to those who need to retreive their shit...
When: 8/10/2001
Company: Paperfly.com
Severity: 100 - new hall of fame inductee!
Points: 200
46 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Crashing down
BuildNet.com, who spent $140 million in venture money over two years and still owes $60 million to other companies, has filed Chapter 11.
When: 8/10/2001
Company: BuildNet,com
Severity: 100 - new hall of fame inductee!
Points: 199
44 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Gee
Genuity is laying off 16%, almost 950 people.
When: 8/10/2001
Company: Genuity
Severity: 35
Points: 134
67 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 hmm
As I write this, the site of that hilarious company Flooz, just says, "We are currently unable to process your transaction. Check back for further updates. We apologize for this inconvenience. " Maybe just a glitch? Probably more, like bye-bye. Either way, get used to it... I told you they'd be around for another month or two -- maybe I was giving them too much credit.
When: 8/9/2001
Company: Flooz
Severity: 30
Points: 124
152 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 King's Quest
Rumor has it around 300 from Sierra will lose jobs on Monday. The Sierra games I've played: King's Quest I and Space Quest III. Oh and Leisure Suit Larry I guess...
When: 8/9/2001
Company: Sierra
Severity: 50
Points: 150
286 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Divorced
CMGI has cut off funding to Engage. When your parent company loses faith in you, you know you're fucked. Of course... if your parent company is CMGI... you should have known that long ago.
When: 8/9/2001
Company: Engage
Severity: 95
Points: 193
154 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Thinking
Rumor has it around 100 people were canned from consulting company AnswerThink. They're sort of my Alma Mater -- I used to work at a company they bought (Think New Ideas) right after everyone quit or was laid off. So really... they bought a bunch of desks and old computers. but oh well. guess they found that out pretty fast... not that anybody gives a fuck
When: 8/9/2001
Company: AnswerThink
Severity: 45
Points: 145
70 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 850 people
here
When: 8/9/2001
Company: Gateway Profile
Severity: 20
Points: 117
163 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Evolution
"Strategic workforce optimization" company (there's something we all clearly need...) Evolve is laying off 20%, over 50 people.
When: 8/9/2001
Company: Evolve
Severity: 40
Points: 140
49 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Wowzers
Covad == Chapter 11.
When: 8/9/2001
Company: Covad
Severity: 100 - new hall of fame inductee!
Points: 196
69 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

Lucked $$$
Anyone care to wager?
When: 8/8/2001
Company: Delias.com
Lucked: 1
Points: 101
67 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Get laid
Rumor has it 13 people were laid off from Playboy.com today. If I worked at Playboy.com, I would probably pretend it was all glamourous and say that naked chicks were walking around all the time n stuff. but that's just me.
When: 8/8/2001
Company: Playboy.com
Severity: 25
Points: 125
203 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Get plugged
Rumor has it Listen.com is going through another round of layoffs any moment now. Apparently somebody from HR was going around giving people hugs. waa.
When: 8/8/2001
Company: Listen.com
Severity: 80
Points: 178
103 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

 Eagles
Rumor has it 50 more associates (on top of the 60 or so already gone) are getting the axe from dot-com mega lawfirm Wilson Sonsini. At this rate, there's gonne be no one left to sue FC!
When: 8/8/2001
Company: Wilson Sonsini
Severity: 80
Points: 180
163 comments in the Happy Fun Slander Corner!

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8/14 05:20 AM EST (Media Guardian)
Webvan chief awarded payout

8/14 04:59 AM EST (Silicon.com)
Online business class fails to take off

8/14 04:59 AM EST (Silicon.com)
Webvan raises cash for chief exec but not shareholders

8/14 03:37 AM EST (New York Times)
AOL Internet Unit to Get Hit With Layoffs

8/14 01:12 AM EST (SiliconValley.com)
Shareholders likely to get nothing from liquidation of Webvan assets

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